High Tech

not a lot of things can top a hockey night evening on a cold and breezy day when you and you friends/family/kids can sit together in front of High Def 60" LCD TV screen and enjoy your favorite snack at the same time.
All day at work you bore through you daily grub of things in anticipation of a game of the night on Versus between your Rangers and the top team in the conference, the beast of the east - Pittsburgh Penguins. I love Versus, finally a channel that does not treat hockey as a second rate sport. I can even put up with Pierre McGuire and Daren Pangs of the world (you know the village idiots) while watching a good game.
So i come home, see my kids all excited and ready to enjoy the game, only to find out that the fu..ing regulation rules have the game blocked out on versus in the local market and Knicks and the Devils are occupying both of the MSG channels (MSG and MSG+) today. So I start a search for the game on never possible to find MSG 2 and finally hit it on channel 197, which of course is not being broadcasted in HD. Damn it. Watching hockey in non HD mode is so 20th century and at this point barely possible, but what do we fans would not do for our passion. So we watch. The crappy picture and constant technical issues (at least on my provider) could not overshadow the good game.

So if you ever find yourself facing high tech technical issues, please refer to this guide i found on the leafs blog as your troubleshooting bible.

Problem: I'm pressing my remote control's "mute" button, but the announcer just keeps getting louder.
Solution: You are attempting to mute Pierre McGuire. Nobody can mute Pierre McGuire.

Problem: My TV is stuck on an image of Sidney Crosby, and the Penguins aren't even playing in this game.
Solution: You have accidentally switched over to an NBC broadcast.

Problem: I recorded my favorite team's game and decided to watch all their goals, fights and big hits, but I ended up just fast forwarding and fast forwarding until the game was over.
Solution: Stop cheering for the Islanders.

Problem: The picture starts out great but gradually becomes blurry more and more, to the point when it is impossible to distinguish what you are watching.
Solution: You must have loaded up on Minnesota or Leafs players on your fantasy team and started drinking more and more as games with these teams continue on without your fantasy team getting any points. Stop drafting players from these teams.

Problem: Your TV is not displaying Shootout as described in a hockey rule book at the end of the Leafs game.
Solution: No worries, it is just Tomas Kaberle spending 45 minutes trying to find somebody to pass to, while attempting a shootout.

Problem: Your TV is slowing down the game. It seems it is showing it in a slow motion.
Solution: it is just any team playing Senators is trying to prolong the time, because they are sure that if they wait long enough Sen's goalie Pascal Leclaire will eventually get injured and they will score at will in the empty net.

So enjoy the games boys.